on the rocks, buddy

disclaimer:

this poem and the pre-poem rambling was written on September 23, 2008. i just got around to posting it, though.

so i got fired from my job this morning, and i decided that instead of moping i would just go to the ocean and think of how easy it would be to drown in it. i went to the Sutro Bath House ruins and walked around for a bit. i climbed over a wall and went down some rocks to a very secluded spot that was sheltered on three sides by rock wall and had a straight view of the ocean. there was also a hole in the floor where the wall would meet the floor and through it you could see the tide flowing into an opening in the rock. when a big wave hit it would send water through and sometimes it would get a couple feet above my head. using pure strategy, i positioned myself and smoked a few bowls while trying to write this poem.

the job sucked, so i wasn't that upset about getting canned. fucking presidio heights weirdos. 

on the rocks, buddy

surrounded by the

     ocean

i think bigger than

  the ship in the

    distance

and the crescent

  moon in the daytime

         sky

i can't be reached here

     in my second

          home

christened by the

            waves

  that could swallow me

          whole

i like to think i crash or

        collide

like the angry edges of the

            sea

but i know

    evaporation

  gets the best of my

       impact--

the muses i'm driven 

   toward are aimed and 

    headed right for me--it's

            confusing

instead of 

  motivation

     i get bruises

beatings meant to 

      improve

meticulous scrutiny for jewelry 

my hopeless

     hands

my only clothing

-my lack of desire for hire-

it's all i'm holding

but i move too 

     quietly

this water gets

    jealous

and the rising

      tide

 tells me to

     leave